What the Hell Happened to Alex?

Hello blogosphere.

It has been so long since I have last even laid eyes on you and now that I am, I am unsure of whether to vent or to cry about my life or to rejoice and tell you all the wonderful. Thinking back it has been about three months since my last post and I can honestly say I have no idea where the time went. It’s like my life took this crazy turn into the pit of despair but then two seconds later jumps into the high heavens to sing the praises of happiness for lack of a better word. My eyes have bags under them, my brain is fried from all the learning and overuse, my nails are bitten down to the nub from nervousness, all the while I maintain that pearly white smile you might know as mine. I am not sure what happened. I remember feeling so young and available and ready and now I just feel done. It all seems downhill from here. This seems like the only place I can vent but then I remembered something. This is my story place. This is the place that I can control out of all the other crazy I have going on that this is what I am going to control. Now that I am writing this as I am falling asleep at a little past the midnight hour, none of this will probably make sense in the morning when I go back to read and find out how much of a moron I am. (Tehe)

 I do have to admit, a lot of things are good and I mean a lot. I am so seriously and head over heels in love with my boyfriend you have no idea. Maybe that is the only thing I need to tell you too. Maybe all you need to know is that I am happy in that area. My friends are very seldom in my life and that makes me very sad and uncomfortable, but I don’t know if I have the correct tools to fix all of them. Its just, life is so complicated and so irritating that sometimes you really just cant deal. Or in my girl translation, “you really just can’t even.”

The thing is, life comes in all shapes and sizes and we all know what an impact the difference of a shape or size can have but like we always hear, “life is like a box of chocolates, because you never know what you’re going to get.” 


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